Yes Virginia, Jay is Grillin'...

Alright, it's hard for me -right now- to be objective and reasonable about a topic that was tossed into my lap earlier this week...

On Wednesday, we received a letter from our apartment complex. This letter was a basic form letter and was given to every resident in the entire complex. This letter, reveling in all of it's nanny-state/fascist bullshit greatness, stated that we immediately have to get rid of our grill.

Thats right, we are no longer allowed to have a grill within ten feet of our apartment.

I'm super-f'ing pissed.

But, like all things nanny, it's a small change. That's what makes it all the more irritating. Sure, it's JUST the grill today. What's next?

So to show my defiance of such a BS rule, I did some amazing grillin' last night.

---

Grilled Bar-B-Q Beef

1 Flat Iron Steak (1lb per two people)
Bar-B-Q sauce (Your choice)
---Dry Rub---
3 T Packed Brown Sugar
2 t Ground Cumin
2 t Chili Powder (Not Pure)
1 1/2 t Salt
1 t Black Pepper
1 t Ground Mustard

Combine all dry ingredients together, and rub generously all over Flat Iron.
Allow steak to marinate at room temp for about 1 Hour.
Grill on low heat for 10 minutes per side. When you flip the steak the first time, brush the grilled side with BBQ sauce. When the second side is done, flip and brush with BBQ sauce and cook for about 1 minute.
Allow meat to rest for 5 minutes, slice thin.

---





I served my Grilled Bar-B-Q Beef with some fresh baked Cheddar Biscuits, and while I pounded out the last of my Cutty, Kerrie had a few Negro Modelo's. To finish it all off, I made a classic Corner Grill Apple Crumb Pie.

It was a very satisfying meal, to say the least. Sometimes the best food I prepare come out of a complete disregard for rules, regulations, of the feelings of the PC thugs. Contempt for authority, what a beautiful thing...

unauthorizedgrillinggrove:
Dr. John - Right Place, Wrong Time
Johnny Cash - The Man Comes Around
David Bowie - Rebel, Rebel
New Order - Regret
Ozzy, DMX, ODB & The Crystal Method - Nowhere to Run

I had no idea that North East Ohio was a major wine producing region. Okay maybe not "major" in the Californian sense, but at a glance I counted over forty winery's in the extreme North Eastern corner of Ohio alone.

To elaborate, Kerrie and I spent some time with her Mom and Dad recently and while we were visiting, we stopped at a few different winery's. Most notably was Ferrante's Winery & Ristorante, and the South River Winery which was actually an old chapel that had been converted into a winery.

First off, I should admit that I did NOT realize Ohio had so many vineyards and winery's. When I heard we were going to Ferrante's, I just figured it was a winery all by itself - end of story. I quickly began to notice signs everywhere for different winery's and many plots of land dedicated to being nothing BUT vineyards. (Sweet! No fucking Corn!)

We were dismayed to hear that the tours had stopped for the season at Ferrante's, but we simply traveled from spot to spot taking in the sights and even trying a few wines along the way.

At the South River Winery, we tried both a Riesling and an Ice Wine. The Ice Wine, I thought, was far too sweet but the Riesling was amazing. Slightly sweet and perfectly cool, I'm kicking myself for not snagging a bottle before we left.






For dinner, we returned to Ferrante's. It's a basic Italian restaurant, but one thats a reliable Italian restaurant. Classic Italian dished, prepared properly without fuss or pretension. I had the House Red and Kerrie had the Rossato. Both went well with our meals, but I found that I liked hers much more than mine. Hers was served at a slightly lower temperature and had a very pleasant sweetness to it.






When all was said and done, I was very taken by what I had learned of that day. I would say discovered, but lets face it - I was lead by hand to the wine. And thankfully so! I had never dreamed there was so much wine being produced up North, but I'm glad to have found out because I don't get over to Sonoma all that often and Bordeaux doesn't look too likely either.

Ohio Wine Association

Of all the things I thought might happen Monday, being attacked by a Bat while walking through the halls at work was not one of them.

And by "bat" I do mean a flying rabid rat.

I had just gotten done taking a break between getting orders for next week sorted out and a fisting of a catering that had come up on short-notice, and as I was walking back to the main kitchen the bat just flew at me and hit me in the chest. At this point I'd like to tell you I was all man, taking care of the problem without flinching –and I can proudly say I didn't shriek or yelp- but it was probably more like Norm MacDonald getting hit with that pen on SNL. A flailing of the arms and a loud "what the fuck!?!" was about all I could muster. Ah, manly.

Our exec came out with a broom and in true-form smacked it around very comically until it was dead. So yeah, that was my Monday.

The End.

A few days back I was reading through the past postings at Is my blog burning? and saw an event listed at YumSugar that peaked my interest. The idea is simple, send them a picture of you with your favorite cookbook. In this particular case I'm going to submit a picture from not so long ago, one I jokingly refer to as "Moses and the Tablets"...



You have to give them "one short sentence" as to why you have chosen whatever cookbook you're holding. For me? I dunno. I'm holding the Professional Chef and Baking & Pastry, both text produced and used religiously by the CIA. (No, the other CIA, Not those shady spy pricks...)

For me, these are classics. They got me through a lot of "what-if" scenarios -including that meal at St. Marks- and always serve as a basis for all the crazy shit I feel compelled to do. Buhleedat.

I have a pretty decent routine going. Up at 6:00am, to bed by 10:00pm, repeat. Things have leveled out quite a lot since I met Kerrie, and even more since I started working for the U.

But there was a time, not so long ago, when the midnight-run was pretty standard. Be it Waffle House, The Corner Grill, or the occasional Big Boy visit, it was common to be out at all hours of the night looking for food to eat. There were quite a few nights where Edwards and I would hit the Waffle House or where Jeb and I would go to Big Boy and just burn the hours away talking about meaningless, but utterly deep, bullshit.

I bring all of this up, because tonight I had a flashback. Nothing too intense or dramatic, but a "feeling" for the past. You see, today Kerrie and I had Chipotle for lunch. I had four tacos and she had a good sized salad. Needless to say, we weren't entirely hungry for a huge meal for dinner. In fact, we weren't really hungry at all. So the evening slipped away and suddenly we were both a tiny bit peckish. In an attempt to make a simple, quick, and light meal, I pulled out some leftover beef tenderloin in Demi Glaze and sliced it thin, then paired it with some french bread and clarified butter. I had an old mix CD on and this feeling caught me. The Late Night Food Run feeling. Something special from that past that I don't do anymore -not that you could drag my ass out of bed at 1:00am anyways- that is still as vibrant now as it was then.





latenightfoodiegroove
Radiohead & The Posies - Blowout
Massive Attack - Protection
Lyle Lovitt & His Large Band - Nobody Knows Me

Tonight was the first night in almost two weeks that I've had a chance to actually work in the kitchen. Between work, the computer, and life in general, things have been too hectic for me to really commit to my bit.

Even tonight, I had to fight the urge to just say "fuck it" and go out to eat. I am glad, however, that I fought that urge and stayed in to make Gnocchi.

I've had the desire to make Gnocchi for a while now, and this past weekend it dawned on me that THIS was my week. This past weekend, incidentally, I worked a catering down in Kentucky for a Catholic church festival with my dopey-ass former co-worker E. While there, I happened to see a calender on the wall as saw that THIS week was The Feast of the Assumption. For those of you from Lakota, the FofA is a big deal in Little Italy in Cleveland. Streets are blocked off, there are vendors everywhere serving pasta and canolis, and they parade a statue of the Virgin Mary down the street.

I have had the pleasure of being there twice during the Feast, and I must say it IS impressive. The whole event is overwhelming, and the food is to die for. This year, however... Not so much, as I'm tethered to work.

So I decided that tonight was my night to make Gnocchi.













---

Garlic Gnocchi
2 Lb. Potatoes
8 Cloves Garlic
1 Cup Flour, Plus 1 Cup for adding in
1 Egg
1 T Salt

Start by peeling the potatoes and quartering them.
Next, bring a pot of lightly salted water to a boil and add potatoes and garlic.
Boil for about 7-9 minutes, or just until soft.
Drain potatoes and garlic, and mash well.
Gather potato/garlic mix into a ball and turn out onto a lightly floured surface.
Make a well in the middle of the potato/garlic mix and add egg and salt.
Add 1 cup flour, gradually, and work with hands until fully incorporated.
Add extra flour as needed to make a nice, slightly firm and smooth dumpling dough.

Cut Dough into 4 pieces and roll each piece into a long cord.
Cut the cord at 1 inch intervals.
Roll each individual dumpling on a Gnocchi Ridger or lightly press a fork onto the dough to make ridges.

Drop Gnocchi into a pot of lightly salted, barely simmering water and cook until the Gnocchi begin to float.

---


gnocchigroove:
Jimmy Eat World - Sweetness
Pinewood Derby - Legacy
Rolling Stones - Street Fightin' Man
Joan Jett & The Blackhearts - Bad Reputation

Jay Makes a Video Blog...

I have this weird tradition... Actually, my brother and I have a weird tradition. It started about 8 years back, during the Christmas-Shopping-Gauntlet, where after hours of getting fisted by every retailer in existence we just stopped at the first restaurant we saw.

(ahem) Red Lobster.

Okay, not exactly the business you were expecting me to reveal but there you have it. Red Lobster... And the tradition became, for whatever reason, that every year after fighting hoards of soon-to-be-ex-boyfriends and junkie-single-mothers, we just went to Red Lobster.

It was and is an odd once-a-year ordeal where I feel I must seek out and -=gasp=- enjoy an afternoon of Scampi, cheddar biscuits, and lots of whiskey.

And so, with the passage of time, I became accustomed to a certain order I would make every year: Cutty on the rocks with a slice of lime, Caesar Salad, Cheddar Biscuits, Aztec Chicken and Broiled Scampi with French Fries and Mixed Vegetables. This has never changed, and as John Cusack once said: "...Eventually, you get to... like it."

So recently, I felt like having that meal. Don't ask why, the urge just hits me sometimes. And being that I like my kitchen and the things I can do with it, I made my own faux-red-lobster dinner.





Personally, I like my meal much better. I can drink a lot of Cutty and not worry about driving anywhere or punching a waitress. Plus, the cheddar biscuits are bigger and more plentiful. All in all, maybe I need a new tradition. And that new tradition should be me, at home, making this meal and then unwinding in front of the fireplace when it's all over...

Yeah.


"Don't you judge me Earl!"
- From My Name Is Earl

Recently, I've noticed a return of the classic but seldom used "lollipop" technique in popular cooking. In the last issue of Restaurant Management magazine there was a very prominent display of various lollipop interpretations, and a few weeks ago my mom even referred to the baby lamb chops I love so much as lollipops.

So yeah, it's making a comeback...



The technique used in the process of making a lolli is the classic but seldom seen Frenching method. Traditionally used on rib roasts and chops, it's actually a fairly simple task of scraping the meat away from the bone to leave a lovely amount of exposed Osseous tissue. As you can tell from the picture above, this basic procedure can be used on just about any piece of meat; that is if you're looking to get a little creative and non-traditional. (In some circles it is blasphemous to even THINK of using this technique on chicken. To quote John Travolta: "Fuck 'em if they can't take a joke...")

The picture above is of Bourbon Chicken Lollipops with Seasoned Shoestring French Fries and a hydroponic lettuce garnish. For all the hype that surrounds this type of meal, it was surprisingly simple to create. I started by chopping the ends off of all the drummettes, then scraped the meat back from the bone. I then soaked the Frenched chicken drummettes in Buttermilk, garlic powder and paprika for about 30 minutes. I then tossed the chicken in seasoned flour and fried in small batches. When the chicken was nicely crisped and golden, I tossed the drummettes in a beautiful bourbon sauce.



Sticky. Slightly sweet... This is one of those meals that was "just right". Homey, if you will. Something nice looking, but something that you could just tear into. (sigh) Why can't all my meals be this satisfying?

bourbonchickenlolligroove:
LuxuriaMusic.com

First off...





It's been a long few weeks. Recently, Kerrie and I saw a bulk of our families and things were a little crazy at work. "Plain Clothes Detectives"-crazy...

And yes, I DID insert a Boz Scaggs video into my food blog.

Over the past two weeks, I was able to cook for Kerrie's sister and niece (A complimentary description of events can be found HERE...) and found that my brother's new girlfriend can really cook...


Mom and Gramma.


My cousin Rebecca.


My brother and his girlfriend Samantha.

The next weekend, Kerrie's sister and her daughter came and stayed with us for the food, fun, and glory that is: Cincinnati.


Kerrie, Sue and Claire - Non Crazy Pic


Flank Fajitas, Fish Tacos & Tequila Lime Shrimp - Before


Flank Fajitas, Fish Tacos & Tequila Lime Shrimp - After


Mayan Hot Chocolate & Creme Churro

All in all, it's been a fun few weeks, but utterly hectic. I'd say I'm glad tomorrow is Friday, but I have to be up at 5:00AM on Saturday to do a catering. With employees dropping off like flies and the Catering Director constantly fucking up, it brings me ever closer to usurping the throne. To quote Bill Murry: "So I got that going for me..."

It's all about that dirty lowdown...

"Now I'm ready to close my eyes, now I'm ready to close my mind..."
- Iggy & The Stooges



Polenta crusted Cod with Roasted Corn & Tomatillo Salsa



Cod Filets
Salt & Pepper
Buttermilk
Cornmeal

Generously season cod with salt and pepper.
Dip in buttermilk the roll in cornmeal. Coat evenly.
Saute in clarified butter for three to four minutes per side.
Place pan in a 350F oven while you assemble plate. (Tortilla, salsa, and Cilantro.)


polentagroove
Iggy & The Stooges - I Wanna Be Your Dog
Iggy Pop - Success
Crystal Method - Vapor Trail
Wu Tang Clan - In the Hood
Some Velvet Sidewalk - Mousetrap (Live)

I've made it pretty clear that I like Sonic. For a big evil corporation, they have some amazing burgers. But, Sonic is not Jolly's...

Jolly's, as I have written before, was a classic drive-up burger stand. A no-frills experience consisting of burgers, hot dogs, french fries and some of the best Root Beer I had ever tasted.

Had?

Yeah... Recently, Kerrie and I drove up to Jolly's for dinner and found the place empty. Not just Cosmo's style-that creepy owner guy is there-empty but full on, cleaned out, nothing left but the shell of a building empty.






This is, to put it lightly, heartbreaking. Possibly because Jolly's had the best burgers I had tasted since the days of Casey's in BG, or maybe because they have definite plans to tear Jolly's down to build a Taco Bell. That's even more depressing when you think about the fact that there is a fucking Taco Bell DIRECTLY across the street from Jolly's already. WTF?!

On a happier note, Kerrie and I had a beautiful London Broil last night. The kind of London Broil that makes true aficionados of red meat weep with joy and amazement. Sliced thin and paired with pan roasted asparagus and a heaping scoop of mashed red skin potatoes, this was one of those rare meals that proves -without doubt- that life is worth living.




---
Grilled London Broil

Marinade
1 1/2 Cup Vegetable Oil
3/4 Cup Soy Sauce
2 T Worcestershire
2 T Dijon Mustard
2 T Kosher Salt
1 T Ground Black Pepper
1 Cup Red Wine
2 T Parsley Flakes
1/3 Cup Lemon Juice

Combine all ingredients thoroughly. Place meat into ZipLock bag and pour marinade over. Seal bag and refrigerate overnight.

Grill meat over low heat, 10 minutes per side for Rare to Medium Rare. Be very careful of flare-ups.
Although not needed, a slight seasoning of Kosher salt on the meat before it hits the grill doesn't hurt.
---





Kerrie found this little diddy that rates blogs. I was hoping for an R but also wasn't going to force it. -=SIGH=-

Recently, Kerrie and I have both been tossing around the idea of video-blogging. I've been wanting to do a podcast for ages, but ultimately didn't think a food blog would work in an audio-only format.

With the recent purchase of a very nice digital camera, my M-Audio Quattro, and a copy of Vegas Video (Thanks Tom!) I think we're just about ready to take the next step forward.

With only a few minutes of tinkering with settings and exploring the options available with this program, I threw together a quick-n-dirty video consisting of a shload of pictures already featured in this blog set to Bring us Bullets by the now defunct rock band Rocket from the Crypt.





There you have it Folks. Me cook yummy good. Uh huh.

Sunday night was perfect for a nice long leisurely meal. It was one of those nights where you can break out a bottle of Cheap-Red and just enjoy a meal. No rush, just lots of time... That's actually kind of infrequent nowadays. The idea that I can, could, and should take as much time as possible to just work on any particular dish has given way to much more dubious intentions. I cook at home, much of the time, like I would cook at work: Fast and sleazy.

Not that my cooking is bad, mind you. I've just grown accustomed to working for quantity results rather than savory, tender quality.

So, to get back in touch with my love of slow cooked foods I decided to make Braised Short Ribs. and they were perfect. Soft and fork tender, they were bursting with perfectly savory combination of tomatoes and chianti. If I were to die and not go to Hell, God would be greeting me at the Pearly Gates with a plate of these divine short ribs.




---

Chianti Braised Short Ribs

3-4 Lbs Boneless Beef Short Ribs
Salt & Pepper

2 Medium Onions, Diced
4-6 Large Garlic Cloves, Minced
2 Cups Chianti
1 28oz. Can Crushed Tomatoes
3 Cups Beef Broth
2 tsp. Herbs du Provence
Salt & Pepper to Taste

Season Short Ribs liberally with Salt and Pepper

Coat a large saute pan (with a lid) with olive oil and place over medium heat. When Olive Oil has heated, sear rib until they are nicely browned and caramelized. Remove ribs from pan and set side on a plate.

In the same pan, while still hot, add the diced onion and cook until translucent. Next, add garlic and cook until fragrant. (Do not brown!)

Add the Chianti, Beef Broth, and Tomatoes - one at a time. Allow each to come to a boil before the addition of the next. Finally, add the Herbs du Provence and stir in thoroughly.

Return the ribs to the pan, plus any of the juices on the plate, and turn the heat down to Low. Cover and allow to simmer gently for three hours.

---

This will, admittedly, leave you with a F-Load of extra sauce. No worries, just pour whatever you don't serve with the ribs into a nice large jar (or three) and use it for pasta or pizza sauce.

Bellissimo!

Being that the summer is now fully upon us, I'm all about the Ice Cream. Perhaps I should elaborate... I love ice cream, especially artisan/marble-slab style ice cream. That being said, there is one thing I love more: Gelato. I love the intense flavor and ultra creamy texture of a good Gelato. Fat and calories be damned!

Alas, I miss those hectic Ann Arbor trips where we almost always wound up at that one Gelato shop near Encore Records and Wizzywig. Every once in a while, when I get nostalgic for those impromptu northbound trips, I like to pull out the ice cream maker and crank out a batch of Gelato.

Gelato, loosely translated, is the generic Italian term for Ice Cream. The major difference between us and them is that they have a lot less air in their frozen treats than we do. None the less, to enjoy a bowl of Gelato is to be in another world. So recently, I made a batch of Coffee Gelato...

To start, I must admit that we were getting rid of a bunch of cans of Starbucks Iced Coffee. I picked up one of the cans of "light coffee" and immediately thought of making Gelato.

---

Coffee Gelato
4 Egg Yolks
1 Cup Sugar
1 T Vanilla
1 Cup Whole Milk
1 Cup Heavy Cream
1 Cup Canned Iced Coffee

Whisk together Egg Yolks, Sugar and Vanilla until pale and creamy.
Bring Milk, Cream and coffee to a boil, then set aside for 10 Minutes and allow to cool.
Stir the Milk mixture into the Egg mixture, the pour into a double boiler.
Cook over medium heat until mixture thickens and coats the back of a spoon.
Allow to cool completely, the refrigerate overnight.
Process mixture in an ice cream maker, then spread into a 1/4 Pan and place in freezer for 2 hours.

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funkygelatogroove
Motorhead - Love me like a reptile
Misfits - Static Age
Rocket from the Crypt - Bring us Bullets
Big Audio Dynamite II - The Globe
Iggy Pop - Success