Heart Breaker, Soul Shaker...

There are few things quite so glorious as expelling some good old fashioned Road Rage on Northbound 75 while blaring Hair of the Dog by Nazareth...

A nice fresh Zucchini is one of those few things.

I don't remember really when I actually figured out how much I loved Zucchini. I've always liked Zucchini bread, and there was that one night at Baxter's where I made this killer Lemon Pepper Zucchini saute, but really I just always remember liking it...

Last week, while visiting my Mom and Gramma, I was lucky enough to snag a small bunch of fresh Zucchini that my Uncle had recently harvested from his garden. And after trekking back and forth all over hell's half acer, it was nice to finally come home and fry up a big batch of Zucchini Shoe Strings.



Fried Zucchini Shoe Strings
1 Medium Zucchini
1 Cup Milk
2 T Old Bay, divided (Or any cajun seasoning)
1 Cup Flour
Oil for Frying

Set aside two bowls. One large enough for the Zucchini and milk, the other for the Flour.
Run Zucchini over a mandolin slicer set to 1/8" Julienne.
Place Zucchini in bowl with Milk and 1 T seasoning, gently toss and allow to sit for 15 minutes.
In second bowl, mix flour and remaining 1 T of seasoning.
Heat oil to 375F.
When oil is ready, take Zucchini by small handfuls and toss in flour. Shake off excess and fry for 2 to 4 minutes or until crisp.
Drain on plate lined with paper towel, dust with sea salt if desired.

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Yeah... Now yer messing with a sonofabitch!

Hey now brother pour the wine...

Our trip North wasn't only to find disturbing Black Velvet paintings of the Pink Panther...

The plan was to do a small wine tour once we hit Ashtabula. We had visited a few vineyards last year, somewhat by surprise, and we unprepared for a day of drinkin'.

This time we had an idea of where we wanted to go and what we wanted to do. Kerrie, her sister Suzanne, and I were ready for an epic wine tasting adventure. NPH epic...

We started out at Ferrante's for a Winery tour and our first round of tastings. Perhaps I was being optimistic when I conjured up visions of touring a winery. I was thinking of oak casks and damp dark cellars. Nope, just some bimbo babbling on about the industry side of wine making. There was lots and lots of warehouse space and cold stainless steel, and not a single wooden barrel.

After the tour, which only lasted about 20 minutes anyway, we decided to get a sampler tray of wines and an appetizer dish of melted Mozzarella cheese, with tomatoes, artichokes and black olives.




Here's the tricky part... I'm no connoisseur. I know a litte bit about wine, but I have a pretty basic palette. I know what I like (Dry reds, slightly sweet and crisp whites) and what I don't like (syrupy sweet stuff, minus Port...). Over all, I'm just a regular Joe with a regular Job... I'm not a wine snob, so please take my ramblings with a grain of salt.

The wine tray we had consisted of 9 wines ranging from slightly sweet to dry. My favorite, which generally wins out when I look for wines to buy, was the Pino Grigio. I liked it for it's clean and crisp flavor. I envisioned several desserts I could knock out paired up with Ferrante's Pino.




After scraping out what little cheese was left from the plate, we decided to drive over to the South River Vineyard. South River is a winery which was placed in an old church. The church itself is beautiful, but the vineyards surrounding the building are amazing. If I didn't know better, I might have thought we weren't in Ohio.

However... The woman staffing the tasting bar wasn't too pleasant. She wasn't mean either, mind you, but I think she sized us up as "tasters" and just didn't care after that. Mental Note: I really should carry around a wad of $50's that could choke a donkey.

We tried 6 different wines before we decided to move on.





Now, here comes the surprise hit of the day: Laurello Vineyards. I can't say enough nice stuff about this place. As we entered, we were immediately greeted with smiles and the impressive opener: Are you having a good day? If not, you're about too... I instantly felt more at home and ready to do a full on tasting.

And we did. The woman working the counter was amazingly nice and talked us through everything we tried, THEN went and gave us a complimentary sample of the one wine we didn't try which wound up being my favorite of the whole day. Their Vidal Blanc was the one wine I absolutely loved and bought on the spot. After a cheese plate and 6 more wines, we knew it was time to slow down.




Kerrie and I left with one of the Vidal Blanc, as did Kerrie's sister. We finished our trek by heading back to Ferrante's to pick up one of their Rosato Blush wines and witness some drunk girl lying in the grass outside the vineyard. Classy.

All in all, it was great to get out and try a lot of different "good" wines. I'm very much looking forward to doing it again. Who's with me?

Once in a lifetime...

Kerrie and I are on vacation this week. We're doing a lot of traveling in a short period of time, and when you stretch yourself thin some things that aren't funny seem hilarious and some things which are otherwise funny seem to get lost in the flow.

THIS is not one of those moments.

Kerrie and I have headed to Ashtabula first with a quick stop in Little Italy (Cleveland) to hit Corbo's Bakery for their Lemon Biscotti cookies, and Mama Santa's for what I consider to be the BEST pizza ever.



Mama Santa's is a classic 70's looking building. Kind of like someone decided to set up a pizza parlour in an abandoned VFW. Like I said, this place has amazing pizza. It's my favorite and the price is dirt cheap.

Now, I've been to Mama Santa's multiple times, but this is the first time I had ever used their restroom. I made my way through the restaurant and went around a corner only to come smack-dab, face-to-face with the greatest Velvet painting ever. (Yes, I said velvet...)



Yup. That's a painting of the Pink Panther on the toilet. And that painting is on black velvet... You can't stop staring at it, can you?

Just you wait, there is more...

Straight to her arms I'd go sailing...

Sundays are simply the best days for cooking, in my opinion...

I always seem to do those long, drawn out dishes on Sundays. The ones you sit and relax over, the ones you certainly don't rush. I love the notion of the whole house filled with some tantelizing aroma, the anticipation of things to come, and that final glorious moment where what was once tough and cheap, turns into an exquisite heavenly commodity.

Today, for example, I made Carnitas.

Carnitas are a simple dish: Braised then Roasted pork. They are, undoubtedly, one of the greatest pork dishes ever. Why so great? Simple - Cheap, Easy, Fuck-Off Delicious. And I'm not kidding with my description there. There is so much flavor and tenderness involved with this dish, it's unreal. The kicker in all of this is how insanely easy it is to make if you have the patience.

Pork Carnitas

2# Pork Shoulder, cut up into small pieces
2 t Kosher Salt
2 t Ground Black Pepper
2 t Ground Oregano
1 Onion, roughly chopped
1/2 cup White Wine
1/2 t Cumin
1/2 t Chili Powder
Water, enough to cover pork

Start by heating 1 T of oil over medium heat in a heavy pan with a lid. (You will NOT need more oil than this...)
Toss the cut up pieces of pork in a bowl with the Salt, Pepper and Oregano and coat generously.
Sear the meat in the pan, in batches, until evenly browned. Set aside.(The fat from the pork with quickly melt into the pan leaving plenty to saute the onion with...)
Add the onion to the pan and saute until golden.
Deglaze the pan with the white wine and simmer until reduced by 3/4.
Add the meat back into the pan, also adding the Cumin and Chili Powder.
Cover with JUST enough water to cover the pork and simmer over low heat for 4 hours.
After the four hours have passed, drain the pork into a collander and place in a bowl. Shred the pork with your fingers or two forks.

From this point, the pork is ready to be eaten but you can take one more step if you wish: Roast or fry the shredded pork until slightly crisp.

---



This is a winning meal, hands down. I topped the Carnitas with a freshly made Pico de Gallo, torn up some Cilantro for the plate, and put down a little spicy chipotle sauce for effect. Paired with a couple of Mojitos and some fresh baked White Chocolate Macadamia Nut Cookies, there is no better to have spent a Sunday evening.

'MERICA!

My initial thought, as I stood in front of the grill basting Baby Back Ribs with a smoky BBQ sauce, was that I wish there were more warm-weather Patriotic holidays. Just as quickly as I thought that, I slapped myself with a hearty dose of "obvious" and realized: I should be doing this shit all year!

Much like Turkey at Thanksgiving, the 4'th of July sticks out as a day exclusively for BBQ. A day when I'm willing to spend a little more and go a little further for dinner. I'm not sure why, though. Aside from there being some excellent sales on Meat this past week at the various grocery stores in the area, I've never fully committed to the notion of firing up the grill and knocking out a couple of racks of ribs.

What's more disturbing is that my love of all things Pork dictates that I should be doing a hell of a lot more BBQing than I currently am.

To be fair though, cooking is about production for me. I love the idea of sitting down to a meal where I've poured my heart into it, but that just ain't my way. When you go to a restaurant you see YOUR plate, very few people think about the hundreds of OTHER plates the pour out of a kitchen every day of every week of every... You get the picture.

Generally, I'm in production mode when I cook. I think of dinner the way I think of anything else: How do I get these all knocked out, over and over, the exact same way? I just don't have time for charcoal and slow cooking, at least that what I keep telling myself...

So after many hours of labor Friday, Kerrie and I sat down to a nice 'Merican meal of Baby Back Ribs, Chipotle Sweet Corn, and Buttermilk Biscuits.






We ended the meal with some Peach Cobbler and an evening on the porch watching the sky light up. In the end, the truth remains: I need to do more BBQ...

bbqgroove:
Sam Spence - The Lineman
Incredible Bongo Band - Let the Be Drums
Joan Jett - Bad Reputation
Mojo Nixon - UFO's, Big Rigs, and BBQ

Good News Everybody...

It's that time of year, once again. Every year, same bat time, same bat channel: My Birthday.

It's odd, as I get older, how I'm less preoccupied with getting stuff and much more interested in getting a free-pass on a few days of excess. Caffeine, Sugar, Fatty Foods, Alcohol, Cigars, staying up a little late, sleeping in a little late... All those things I set aside as "once-in-a-while" expenditures, I tried to cram into one action-packed weekend.

As soon as I got home Friday from work, I was ready to roll. I had two beautiful Flat Iron Steaks marinating, which were just begging for some face time with sweet lady Grill...

When Kerrie got home, she treated me to my birthday presents. Let me be the first to say that she is the coolest frikken' woman ever born. Why? THIS:



Yeah, that's right, she wrapped my presents up into a package made to look like Bender Bending Rodriguez himself. I was so in awe that I was hesitant to ever touch it. Yeah, it was that awesome...

Inside, however, were two gifts that thoroughly pleased me: Futurama- The Beast with a Billion Backs and the first season of Anthony Bourdain's No Reservations on DVD.

Back to the steaks... I had two Flat Irons marinating in a Bourbon sauce, so I threw those on the grill and whipped up some Garlic Smashed Potatoes and Mixed Vegetables.



After dinner, Kerrie again amused me with my favorite birthday treat: Yellow Cake with Chocolate frosting. Yeah, I know... It's pretty plain and unoriginal, but it's my thing. I Love Yellow Cake with Chocolate Frosting.



On Saturday, we made a trip to Cinnabon. I may not be a fan of chain restaurants, but I loves me sum Cinnabon.



Before heading over to Jungle Jims for groceries, we stopped at the Tinderbox and I picked up a nice CAO Criollo.

After our grocery run, Kerrie and I went up to West Chester for lunch and Jay's First Annual Ikea Challenge. For lunch we stopped at a nice little coffee shop called Tazza Mia. At first glance, this place screams franchise. It's clean and polished and everything is refined, but when you get down to it, it's a local establishment and -to tell the truth- downright amazing. I had their Pot Roast panini and a cappuccino. Kerrie had the Chipotle Turkey Bacon panini, and as we ate I couldn't help but think of Professor Farnsworth's immortal words: You know you really don't cook enough roasts Leela!




After lunch we made our way to Ikea. Now, before we go to far, let me explain the challenge. My grandmother sent me a gift of $25 for my birthday, and I immediately thought of some stuff I wanted to get at Ikea. I have come to truly love Ikea, but really want to have an affair with their prices. So the challenge was simple: See how much stuff we could get for $25 without going over. In the words of the PiKea Bot: Enjoy yer afferrdable Svedish crahp!









On our way home, we got caught in an impressive thunderstorm/downpour. Still not as bad as that one day in B.G., but it was a little tense on the way home.

Just like that, though, the rain let up as the skies cleared and the rest of the afternoon was extremely pleasant.

For dinner I made a beautiful Neapolitan pizza. Homemade dough, and sweet and tangy sauce, provolone and parmesan cheese, and plenty of fresh chopped basil. Bellissimo!




Kerrie and I ended the evening on the porch, where I enjoyed my cigar and glass of Cutty & Lime.



Sunday, my actual birthday, was much more low-key. After church I made a delectable Ragu of Port, Italian Sausage and Short Ribs. A thick, rich, intense sauce of epic proportions that I had been longing for recently, taking me back to those cold winter nights with a roaring fire and lots of people gathered around a tiny table...

And, as quickly as it appeared it then disappeared. 33 and still going strong. It's a celebration bitches...


Thanks to Gramma, My brother, Mom & Dad Fassett, Sue, and my Mom... Who refuses to let me forget that my birth took 48 hours.

Why say something nice when you can tell the truth?

I realized, recently, that it's been almost a month since I last posted.

There is no excuse. I used to be able to go to Howard's, get loaded, and spout off some truly inspirational crap. Now? Well, now I get sleepy real early and need to go nighty-night.

That is, without a doubt, pretty freekin' weak.

It's made me realize I miss a lot of things from BG. A night out at Cohen & Cooke, a Brown Jug at Trotters, or a heap of waffle fries from Mr. Spots... One of the things I may never have actually revealed from my former life on the inside, was my love of the French Onion Steak Sandwich from Easy Street.

I miss it so much, I felt compelled to make it for dinner last night. There is nothing quite as comforting as a fuck-huge sammich of Steak and Provolone with some perfectly caramelized onions.




Served up with a simple au jus and a pile of potato chips, this and a bottle of some cheap red wine made for a damn fine meal.

Stoppin' off that the truck-stop "Earth", lookin' for some food to eat...

Kerrie and I officially began our epic BBQ-gauntlet for the summer yesterday.

As previously stated, I want to hit as many different BBQ places this summer as possible. I'm sure plenty of people will be chiming in on the topic of authentic BBQ, but try and take it easy. My goal is simply to eat as much pork and beef as possible.

So, last night Kerrie and I went to Rib City Grill just outside Jungle Jim's.

First off, I was expecting something "else". More of a sports-bar thing, maybe? It was actually a very nice, home-style BBQ restaurant. So right off the bat, I was happy with my surroundings.

The food was amazing. Everything was perfect in a way I wasn't used to in most restaurants. The manager came out and talked to us about their different sauces, the price wasn't outrageous, and the portions were ample. All this, plus the food tasted great.

I had the Rib Tips with Corn, French Fries and Garlic Toast. The tips were smoked and very tender then finished with a brown sugar bbq sauce. I was in heaven...

Kerrie had the BBQ Pork Sandwich which was similar to the pork I had, but she added her own sauce.





All in all, this may not have been the best place for me to start this epic lil' journey at because I really dig this place. Now I'm going to be comparing everyone else to these guys, plus I'll be wanting to go back - often.

Shit.


retrogroove:
Mojo Nixon - UFO's, Big Rigs & BBQ
Spin Doctors - Little Miss Can't Be Wrong
MC Brains - Oochie Coochie
Nazareth - Hair of the Dog
Faith No More - Epic
Ted Nugent - Free for All

Rave On!

Many thanks to the Commodore for his very gracious gift...




A good day to all...

Vietnam Memorial Wall

You used to say that it was so easy...

With May winding down and June right around the corner, I've committed my talents to more warm-weather cooking. For the past few years I usually pull out my copy of Summer Cooking by Elizabeth David sometime in April and flip through it for inspiration and insight, and now that the warm weather seems to have finally arrived I've gotten back into the swing of grilling and roasting and exploring some of those exotic deep-south and South-American flavors.

One of those "flavors" I like a lot comes from a simple Mole sauce. Thinking of Mole, I decided to use a Chocolate Cherry Doctor Pepper and a "beer-can roaster" that my brother and his fiance gave us to make a Chocolate Cherry Chicken Mole. While the flavor was really impressive, I'm just not sure about the technique involved. I did my chicken in the oven and the overall product was good, just not as juicy and chocolate-cherry as I had expected.

Before


After


Plated


I look forward to experimenting with this a little more, in addition to some of the other "summer" foods I already have in my repertoire - especially Grilled Barbecue Flat Irons.

In the meantime, my summer challenge is to hit as many Cincinnati barbecue restaurants as possible. There are quite a few BBQ places of note fairly close, including Symmes Tavern and Burbanks, so I'm hoping Kerrie and I can to a lot of them before September 1'st.

It Begins!

summercookinggrove
Foo Fighters - Baker Street
Matthew Sweet - Sick of Myself
Stevie Wonder - Higher Ground
Tom Petty - American Girl

It's all about that dirty lowdown...

Friday night, in the pouring rain, Kerrie and I went to a classy -but by no means fancy or fine- Italian restaurant called Vincenzo's.

The food was exceptional. I'd like to make that clear right off the bat. The only real problem with the meal was that our waiter -the uber-trendy metrosexual type who loves pointing out all of the flaws potential, present, and departing diners- was a douche. The busboy who brought us our water, bread and finally came around to ask if Kerrie needed a box was cool. He wasn't just cool, he was pleasant and had his shit together.

I'm not going to hammer on about the guy who was begrudgingly waiting on us, because the food was, as stated, exceptional. Kerrie had the Pollo Saltimboca, a chicken based dish with mushrooms and a deliciously sharp marsala wine sauce. I had the Ravioli Bolognese, which was very good. Good to the point where I actually was thinking: How DID they make this?

We finished the meal two pretty obvious desserts. I had the Cannoli and an Espresso, while Kerrie had the Panna Cotta. Both were text-book perfect, in the sense that they weren't being screwed with at their most basic level. They were perfectly portioned and tasted exactly as you would expect a familiar dessert to taste.

Overall, the meal was excellent but the waiter -while being basically competent- was almost enough to reconsider going back.

On the other end of the food scale, Kerrie and I had lunch from the Root Beer Stand today. We took our food to-go and went over to Sharon Woods to eat, and I have to say that I was impressed. I had a basic cheeseburger and a Root Beer, and both were amazing. The root beer had this slightly creamy vanilla-ish sort of flavor. I'm sort of a sucker from the classic car-hop, and I love a good burger. Despite the CASH-ONLY aspect, I know I'll be going back...

Lookin' back for a little green bag...

I don't get why more people don't look forward to Breakfast. Maybe I've actually bought into that goofy notion that breakfast is the most important meal of the day, or maybe I've seen Reservoir Dogs a few too many times, but I really get into breakfast.

There is something utterly amazing about one of those hefty Bacon & Cheese Omelets from the Corner Grill or a stack of pancakes from First Watch, and there are very few feelings better than a cheap cup of coffee in a heavy ceramic mug.

I am a huge fan of the cheap diner, and God knows that's usually where you find the best meals, but sometimes you just need to do it yourself.

Last Sunday, a perfectly sunny spring morning I might add, Kerrie and I sat down for Sweet Cream Waffles, Maple Smoked Sausage, and Dark Roast Coffee.




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Sweet Cream Waffles
2 Eggs, separated into two bowls
2 Cups Heavy Cream
2 T Sugar
2 Cups Flour
1 T Baking Powder
1/2 t Salt
1/3 Cup Oil

Begin by preheating waffle maker to high heat.
Beat egg whites to stiff peaks, then set aside.
Combine all ingredients, except egg whites, in second bowl. Mix until smooth.
Gently fold egg whites into batter by hand, paying attention not to lose volume of whites.
Pour appropriate portions onto waffle maker and bake for 3 to 5 minutes.
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